Journal Entry 016-b

And I descended.

The area I entered was cold, dead and lifeless. I went down a small grouping of stairs, into a great hall, with inscriptions adorning every surface. Not wanting to waste time, I ignored them. The Halls seemed to stretch on for at least fifty meters, so I decided to explore what I could. One of my top rules for Dungeons and Halls-of-the-Damned was to explore every room and kill every creature. These were important rules, too. I made them up the moment I entered. That's how important they are.

The first room I entered was as dull as the hallway, save for a lone sarcophagus on the far side of it. The room looked to measure at least twenty by thirty feet. I entered cautiously, gripping my Nail Bat near my right shoulder and swinging it in a small circle, like a Batter would in a Baseball Diamond. I checked my footing, looking back on the "Sentry Elimination" I learned from the Military. I placed my foot slowly, making sure the surface I was stepping on was solid and tight, before pushing my weight into it. I slowly made my way over to the sarcophagus, without any issues.

...I... Really didn't plan this out too well. I gazed upon the pony-sized Sarcophagus, and flipped a mental coi-Oh, who the Hell am I kidding? I'm opening this bitch one way or another.

Slipping my fingers into the crack of the sarcophagus door like a gay plumber pulling up his pants, I felt my fingers strain as I wrenched open the heavy, stone hinges of the coffin away from their latch. I was backpedaling as soon as I opened it up, Bat at the ready- I had seen enough horror movies to know what might happen. Lucky for me, there was nothing in the tomb but a small piece of paper.

Notebook paper, at that!

I picked up the slice of paper and began reading it. It was in english, thankfully.

"It's been several hours since I began searching for the true tomb of Imhotep. I know The Mummy wasn't just a hoax! I need to find that damned mummy! But, so many unmarked tombs in Egypt... I must have stumbled upon some different kind of tomb. Instead, I fell into a deep pit. I felt something hit me, almost like, like a hoof or a goat's foot, and I was unconscious. When I came to, I stumbled upon yet another tomb, to my luck. I simply thought I fell asleep at the encampment, and my excitement had me dreaming, but... No. No, no no. This is different. There's something in this tomb."

This rustled my jimmies but good.

With a deep growl, I settled on searching the rest of this tomb. Didn't have to tell me twice for me to figure out this guy was Human, and since the only pony that wasn't too surprised to see me when I first arrived was Celestia, then this guy was probably here decades before my arrival. If his remains are still in this tomb, I might be able to loot something off of his corpse. But ONLY if he died here. Sure, sure, to most of society, looting the corpses of the dead is a distasteful chore. But I am not an idiot. What use do the dead have of Gold?

The next room in the Temple I entered was a ways down the hall and to the right. This room was filled with nothing but pony skulls, adorning every surface. I gripped my bat tighter and slowly motioned in, as I did the last room. I looked around, and I found nothing of interest.

Then, I heard the clunking noise of bones shifting to my 'Six.

I turned, readying my bat, to swing at whatever was moving the bones. Before I could react, something was smacking into my Solar Plexus, winding me, and flinging me out of the room. I dropped my bat in the process and let out a loud "OOMPH" noise as I crashed into the wall outside the room. I looked ahead, into the tomb that was only barely illuminated by the sunlight pouring in from some form of gem in the ceiling.

There, standing, ready to pounce me, was a small creature. Wrapped partially with decayed bandaging, it's back legs were bent backwards oddly, and it's forelegs were split in two, each half brandishing three massive claws each. It's tail was elongated, and tipped with a jagged spearpoint at the end.

"Screw that noise!" I said, as I quickly unsheathed a throwing knife from my belt while leaning against the wall, and chucked it at the small rope-rock mechanism that opened the large, stone door. The creature roared forward, but only slammed into the wall as the door closed. I began to hear a sort of drilling and burrowing sound. As if the creature was smashing through the rock.

Without any strong weapons, I was hopeless against that thing! I had to find some gear, quick! As such, I kicked my ass into the tenth gear and was rocketing down the hall, clutching my belly where the creature had smacked into me. I had retrieved my throwing knife- Deadly, though this tool was, that creature moved to fast for my half-assed throwing ability to keep up with. At the end of the hall, was a wider, darker door. I threw myself through it, and was in disgust at the sight.

An open sarcophagus. A big-boy tomb, this time. And on it's lid, sat a rotting, human corpse. Judging by the decomposition, he's been down here, with only basic bacteria gnawing on him, for at least forty years.  Jesus Fuck.

But, something caught my eye. The corpse was tightly clutching a...

A Machete. A black-bladed Machete. One that would have been used back in 'Nam.

I snapped the blade from the mummy's grip and examined it. It was prestine- save for the stench of death. But I could wash that out. I looked into the Sarcophagus next, and my eyes glimmered. There was at least two hundred pounds of Gold in there, alone. Before I could get too Greedy, I heard the Stone Door beginning to crack.

"Dammit..." I let slip from my lips. I recalled that this cave was filled with natural methane, and decided to try something else. I remember that I packed a five-second delay Flare in my Coat Pocket... It would take even the smallest spark to ignite the Methane and blow this place to High Hell...

I began to run back towards the exit, but before I left, I grabbed the Bag the corpse had on it. A small, black Messenger Bag. Then, I ran. I passed the door, and En-passant with it I felt the force of the creature finally breaking through. I turned to check, and the creature grabbed me around the throat, dragging me into the room of skulls it was in, and hurling me into a pile of bones. Luckily, I didn't get skewered. I growled, and dive-rolled out of the pile. Rising to my feet, I brandished the Machete and taunted the creature with my hand- While my eyes actually stared at the Nail Bat lying slightly to my side.

The creature flew forward with horrendous speed. I barely managed to dive out of the side and grab hold of my Nail Bat. Instead of staying and fighting, I began to cheese it like a bat out of Hell. I shot up the steps, and before I reached the safety of Daylight, I found my ankle getting grabbed. I hurled my weapons through the entry way, and grabbed onto the lip of a step, using my upper-body to turn myself around. The creature crawled up and prepared it's arms to lash at my throat.

I wasn't having it.

I quickly jarred the monster in the throat with the tip of my thumb, then fed it an Elbow Sandwich a couple of times. Enough to disorient it and let me crawl backwards. As I did, I removed the Delay Flare- which was activated by a small, nylon-ring pin- and performed a Reverse Hammer Fist, jamming the Flare deep into the monster's empty eye socket.

"Adios, Mother Fucker!" I taunted, as I pulled the pin and backed up, slamming a brutal Stomp Kick into the still-disoriented Monster's face, sending it flying down the stairs. I coiled backwards out of the tomb, counting my seconds. On the last two, I leaped forward onto my stomach, and covered my head with my arms.

Ka-Boom.